Limitless Love.

23 years old, 24 running.

I feel sad about numbers sometimes, they don't get as importance as others. Taylor Swift helped 22, but other than that, it's quite a dry spell.

Every time I read those 20 things I learned before turning 20 and 30 and 40, it sounds cool and everything, but I never read past 5. 

I think learning is personal. it's your journey from self-realization to self-growth.  

so yes, let's come to another pointless - too many points blog. Apart from a vampire, I have become transitioning into one of those, " it's okay, it's life, I accept it" people. I have understood that Therapy ki nahi punar janam ki zarurat hai.  jk. See the future is scary, but then we can't also keep going back to the past because it's familiar. Right?

You have to complain to gain new perspectives, 

You have to keep having problems, to create new solutions & better ways.

you have to be put through crap, to learn to deal with it. 

Quite a “um so negative thought” but it’s just life spoken out loud.

In one of my previous blogs, there was this one sentence that many of you texted me about -

"We are born with hope, and every other feeling is a molecular baby of hope."

As an adult of the 21st century, bombarded with privileges and leverages but atrocities of love and its forms, it’s quite natural for me to crave the exact thing that I am devoid of. It’s how humans are wired. To crave, want & need the things they are devoid of. 

Lately, I observe and recognize myself as an individual who is in a constant battle of whether to care or not care. to be fearless & challenge it or to succumb & make peace with it? Forgive & forget or Retaliate & revenge? I end up finding myself doing the deeds that practically mean the best. 

The real test is to be kind to unkind people, It’s difficult, as it should be but that’s the catch, right? From what you & I both know, It sometimes feels like drowning and the person you thought would save you is just adding more water. The choice to crib and drown and die or to still try and put your hands out and hop on the half-a-swimming lesson which you never really thought you’d need comes to use, and that is called, love. 

Why does it say, everything is fair in love and war. 2 entirely different activities, won’t you say? Only these can be won over each other.

While losing the game of dice, Draupadi was being betted. Dhritarashtra asked Draupadi, “Don’t you want anything for yourself? Ask for something for yourself.” She was still not free. 

She said, “I don’t want anything; I am willing to be a slave. Let these men who staked me in the game be free. Let them be kings. I have loved them.” At that point, Dhritarashtra returned everything the Pandavas had lost to them and granted them and Draupadi their freedom. The Kauravas, Karna, and Shakuni were disappointed. Karna said, “Such great Kshatriyas, and they were saved by a woman & her love. Brave men are these? They got away cheaply & that's their punishment.

Love saves. Period. Including love, every feeling has to be lived in their own shoes, grief, sadness, hatred, jealousy, love, and dot dot dot. The most absurdly spoken of feeling is Love. The limits exceeding the capacity of love get weirder day by day. It’s legit a weave of “grass is always greener on the other side, love is blind, it has to be lived to be written about later”

I am sure “Not every mistake deserves a consequence, Sometimes the only thing it deserves is forgiveness” was said by somebody deeply madly in love. 

One of my friends mentioned that somebody else mentioned, “Pyaar keliye nai kiya toh, kiskeliye kiya?” which means, “If you dont do it for love, what would you do it for”—something to think about.

It’s just that you stick by all of these, for yourself, but you can’t see somebody else going through it. Again, forms of love, what to do now?

One should also have that kick, that one kick, now may that be mental or physical, when you know you have to pack up your shit & leave. Of course, everybody's level of patience in getting kicked is different, all I have to say is, there should be that realization and a limit of kick, that's all. It sometimes gets so hard that you have to forget what you feel and remind yourself what you deserve. 

But yaar, Love. What is that thing? Has anybody cracked, how can it make you do all the things you thought you’d never think of? How does it make you want to break your limitations? Tell me it's science, it is right? It's all the molecules, bubbling in your head and making your vision to the rights blurry so that you love right? yeah? Lol. The above paragraph is an apt example of delulu is the real solulu. 

You know how earth has different air and smell, which comforts you. For eg going back to my nani’s place, and breathing the air gives me a weird sense of comfort, tho it's mostly just ayurvedic medicines and fruits but yeah. Humans are so innocent that in love, they end up loving the most mundane things, and that's it. That becomes your love language. For eg, the smell of a person. Elites would say it's the perfume, I am here talking about the smell of the person, the comforter used on their shirt mixed with the subtle sweat smell because of using the same perfume for years mixed with their favorite food mixed with their favorite perfume. 

Yes stop smelling now, come back. It’s either the most beautiful imagination or the worst destruction. Love languages, it’s different for everybody. In the name of feminism, equality, and basics I see a lot of it being unappreciated. I mean I get it that him holding my bags shouldn't be a big deal, it is basic chivalry, but when it's a love language when anybody holds it for me, it is the care turned into action that matters, and sorry I really wouldn't want it from the space of chivalry because then where is my “Abla naari, I am independent, and I can hold my bags” so yeah let's not mix it guys, let’s appreciate the little things, because at the end that's what leads to the bigger things. 

Toh kya haina dost, is dil ke ghar, mei kahi log ate hai, jatey hai, kuch reh jatey, kuch chale jatey, agar kis ko dekhkar tumhare dil ka pet bhar jaye na, toh unhe rok lena chahiye, poori takkat aur shiddat se, kyuki kehte hai, dil ka rasta pet se hokar jaata hai. Trust me it gets easier you just have to do it every day, and that is the hard part & Just because you love something, doesn't mean it will be easy. We dont need to rush to our destination when we are on the train, we just need to enjoy the ride.

Love gives you the courage to be disliked by the world, just to be in love with what you are calling your world. It's hard to wait around for something you know might never happen, but it's harder to give up when you know it's everything you want. You dont know how strong you are until being strong is the only option left.

Anyways, life has a life, and time heals broken promises, It is the journey from buying roses for her to buying dhaniya for her, wait for the rains to stop in your head patiently, thy shall your flowers will bloom. Love hard, kya pata kal ho na ho.

Love limitless.

Until Next time, xoxo, aarya.